Directed by: Gareth Edwards
Written by: David Koepp
Starring: Scarlett Johansson, Mahershala Ali, Jonathan Bailey, Manuel Garcia-Rulfo, Rupert Friend, Luna Blaise, Audrina Miranda, and David Iacono
Runtime: 134 minutes
‘Jurassic World: Rebirth’: The characters’ hope for survival on this on-foot journey is less believable than dinosaurs roaming the planet in 2025. For starters, did anyone get their malaria shots?
According to the official trailer, “A new era is born.”
“Jurassic World: Rebirth” is the seventh movie in the “Jurassic Park” franchise. In the previous sequel, “Jurassic World: Dominion” (2022), the producers, casting agents, and director Colin Trevorrow combine both casts from the “Park” and “World” series. However, Chris Pratt, Bryce Dallas Howard, Laura Dern, Sam Neill, Jeff Goldblum, and BD Wong couldn’t save “Dominion” (1 out of 4 stars), a convoluted and boring mess that, in this critic’s opinion, is the single worst film in the series.
In 2025, director Gareth Edwards (“Rogue One: A Star Wars Story” (2016), “Godzilla” (2014)), writer David Koepp, the producers, and casting agents take a different approach and offer an entirely new cast but set them in the same universe as the first six films, 32 years after the events of “Jurassic Park” (1993).
So, we aren’t traveling to Earth 2 for this on-screen adventure, but by the end of “Rebirth”, perhaps you’d rather be anywhere but inside a movie theatre for this particular film. More on this later.
For now, it is the present day, and dinosaurs are dying off across the world except for a specific band of tropical latitudes near the equator. The movie revolves around one ill-advised hunting expedition on Ile Saint-Hubert, an island teeming with dinosaurs. Worse yet, mutant dinosaurs were engineered on this island – 17 years earlier - by the infamous InGen.
Yikes!
Well, within the first 15 to 20 minutes, Edwards introduces the audience to a corporate hustler type, a pharmaceutical executive, Martin Krebs (Rupert Friend), who would probably swindle his grandmother from her life savings, and he recruits an uber-confident mercenary, Zora Bennett (Scarlett Johansson), and a nerdy, unathletic paleontologist, Dr. Henry Loomis (Jonathan Bailey).
He’s no relation to Dr. Samuel Loomis (Donald Pleasence), in case you were wondering.
Zora is tougher than your average Velociraptor. She loves to smile and offer snappy comebacks, and Dr. Loomis, with two left feet, is frequently impressed with Zora’s Indiana Jones-like action-star dance moves.
They rendezvous with Duncan Kincaid (Mahershala Ali) on his boat, and we meet his team, which includes Bobby (Ed Skrein), Nina (Philippine Velge), and a couple of others, but who can keep track? This Ocean’s Six, Seven, or Eight set course for Ile Saint-Hubert, and all they need to do is collect three blood samples, one from each of the largest dinosaurs on this Rumble in the Jungle. No problem, right? The giant lizards, whom Dr. Loomis calls out by name (but one would need subtitles for the spelling or Wikipedia for reference) are from the sea, land, or air, so the script allows the actors to partake in three different sets to capture fluids.
However, they aren’t alone.
Mind you, international laws prohibit travel near the equator due to the concentrated and deadly packs of dinosaurs that swim, roam, and fly, but that doesn’t stop Reuben Delgado (Manuel Garcia-Rulfo) from hopping on his sailboat with his soon-to-be-college-bound daughter, Teresa (Luna Blaise), his (roughly) 8-year-old daughter, Isabella (Audrina Miranda), and Teresa’s slacker boyfriend, Xavier (David Iacono), a guy who brags to Reuben that he has weed, but his stash is unfortunately wet.
Well, this family adventure is suddenly all wet, as an ocean dinosaur tips over their boat, and they call for help. Duncan, with Zora’s encouragement, answers their distress call and brings the family and boyfriend along for the blood sample treasure hunt.
It’s a bit of madness that Reuben takes a voyage with three kids in banned waters, and thankfully, Duncan calls this out too. Everyone in the audience is thinking the same thing, but then Martin, Duncan, Zora, and the Ocean’s crew bring Reuben and the teens/children, due to convenience, to Ile Saint-Hubert for the dino escapade.
So, the Ocean’s crew and Reuben and kids traverse all over the island, filled with ancient reptiles big and small, during the second and third acts. “Rebirth” runs for 134 minutes, but how could these humans last 134 actual minutes walking around Ile Saint-Hubert with T. rexes, Velociraptors, Pterodactyls, Brontosauruses, and oodles of hungry, snapping lizards who might only stand 12 inches high?
Is the water safe to drink? Apparently! One character dips his flask into a small stream, or was it a puddle?
Did anyone get their malaria shots?
As implausible as it is for dinosaurs to roam the planet in 2025, audiences have bought into this cinematic universe for over three decades. However, what is more far-fetched is this human party surviving this on-foot journey, including just finding a safe place to sleep or rest.
Reuben also injures his ankle early in the first act and finds trouble walking, but on other occasions, he seems to saunter along just fine. Weird…and convenient.
It’s all too convenient that the Delgados and Xavier are included in Koepp’s screenplay, but perhaps the studio heads, marketing, or Koepp decided that kids need to be included in “Rebirth” to help attract younger audiences to theatres. One must figure that the Under-18 crowd has cheered on Black Widow (Johansson) in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, but Scarlett hit it big 22 years ago in “Lost in Translation” (2003). The Boomer, Gen X, and Millennial crowd have Sofia Coppola’s modern-day classic covered, but probably not Gen Z.
Then again, a friend recently informed this critic that Jonathan Bailey stars as Fiyero in “Wicked” (2024). Who knew? Millions of moviegoers, other than yours truly. Geez, the casting department has cast a wide net for popular stars. Bailey is fine as Dr. Loomis, for the record.
The massive art department, visual effects and special effects teams reached spectacular heights – the size of 10 Brontosauruses – in crafting a convincing environment and the creatures’ playground of dangers that awaits any fool who attempts to trek across the island and the nearby sea.
A pack of Jurassic whales, a crazy new form of Brachiosaurus, a fearsome T. Rex, and a terrifying giant carnivorous mutant make the most impactful marks, and a couple of chase scenes might be paying homage to “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” (1984) and “The Mist” (2007). Then again, these moments conjure the most laughable surviving fall from towering heights since “John Wick: Chapter 4” (2023) and a repeat of the Velociraptor kitchen scene from “Jurassic Park” (1993), respectively.
We’ve seen these dinosaur thrills and chills countless (check that, six times) before. Then again, in another sequence, we witness the slowest and most eye-rolling T. Rex chase in “Jurassic Park/World” history, so that’s new.
(Oh, did this review mention that a simple Snickers bar wrapper somehow becomes an eternally lethal instrument?)
As engaging as Johansson, Ali, and company seem in real life and (usually) on-screen, do we care if Zora, Duncan, the Delgados, and everyone else make it out alive? Zora, Duncan, and Loomis’ compassion versus Krebs’ greed is a curious but predictable storyline that deserves some consideration. Otherwise, it’s an open question. It depends on whether one’s suspension of disbelief is set or not in this extraordinarily unreasonable hike.
Perhaps “Jurassic World: Rebirth” needs one carryover from the other films. Where is Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum) when you need him?
Jeff’s ranking
1.5/4 stars
